My table is litered with my life
a pen
a watch
a glass of water
and a letter
A discman
coughing music
my phone
never rings
a half written letter
of apology
to god
the screen flickers
from white to black
I'd sell my soul
for a decent screensaver
my life is
ones and zeros
bits and bytes
little fights
I don't care to win or lose
when all is said and done
there is no need for anything
love
hate
money
friends
health
music
skills
traits
madness
Just snow on the TV screen
What will be and what has been.
-=-=-=-=-=-=-
Lot of existential dilemmas today and a general disregard for any kind of positivity. And a hidden hint for someone in this poem;)
hahahaha... the use of skills and traits was interesting. ;-)
ReplyDeleteNow for the critique...
Existential angst portrayed at its best. The first stanza is very powerful, and ironical at the same time. The table holds life... Vitality in the form of water, emotions in the form of a letter, "Time is ticking away" says the watch and the pen tempting you to write the story of your life with your own hands... Live!
Interesting. :-)
I like the plosive way in which the poem blurts out... spits almost, a word or two, a phrase at times. The absence of punctuation ads to that effect. There is this constant flip between two emotions-"anger" and the feeling of "giving up". between philosophy and triviality.
Good work!
'Just Snow on TV screen'
ReplyDeleteits just snow!like tht .
I like the last verse. Putting a single word line by line emphasized for me the strength for each one.
ReplyDeletewhat u like snow white or sumthin???...and what letter is it that u hav on ur table
ReplyDeleteWF...
ReplyDeleteWoah!~! you are reading too much into the lines:) i just wrote what i saw on my table. but I guess to each her own ;)
I bank more on the trivial side with this poem :)
----
Oracle...
Snow and voices ;) of the Dead!
----
Fredrick
The strength is there only when we give value to these things, otherwise they are just...things :) Cheers! and yeah come back or i'll hunt you down!
---
TOT
I could use some white snow ;) snow white wasn't bad either ;) ;)
the letter is an apology to god, for everything.
Cheers all!
N
N
Hmm. Hidden hint -- you want someone to call you? you want someone to buy you a new t.v.? You want someone to send you a screensaver? You want a new discman? I'd like to see the letter to God.
ReplyDeleteVery intriguing. As always.
Kat