Talk with a Higher Power

Dude, whats up? Long time no see.
I've been bored like a duck, whats been up your tree?
I thought a lot of mailing you, did you think of calling me?
But now I've got you by the neck. Let's get talking. Right? Whee!

What about the accidents you've been sending my way?
What about the co-worker who turned out to be gay?
And the lap dancing girl who just would not stay?
The auditioning guitarist who played worst than Brian May!

All the ridiculous shit you've been pumping at me
Stories reading like stupidity and fucked up rhymes in poetry
I'm sick of all these jokes I'm sick sick sick in reality!
I've been trying to write so much but you've kept me busy!!

Ah but now your days are done you can't hold down the muse
I've got a bee in my head and I'll use what I can use
I've had it up to here with your literal abuse
Cuz a writer is what I am, this madness I can't lose.

Dude? you awake? why is your face turning blue?
I just held your neck for a minute what is happening to you?!
Come on stop playing, I just needed someone to talk to
But heck, I've had my rant so I have no use for you!