silence

should have barb-wired my lips ages ago
what use are the words that fall on deaf ears
when the meanings change, re-arrange
depending on what they want to hear

should have plugged my ears with wax
what fun in listening to sermons
that make sense only in a make-believe world
while reality gnaws on the edges of the sanity

should have broken my fist long ago
before it became an accusing finger
to point at the logic they never understood
now the words forgotten, bitterness lingers

silence is golden, it costs the same too
now the silence eats me from inside
on the surface everything is calm
on the inside, I scratch the wounds raw
-\-
let it all out, right?

New year,  new fear.