Kicked in the Balls

Kicked in the Balls

I got kicked in the balls
by a shiny pointed heel
that belonged to the foot of a 
smooth white leg
I dropped my peg
and dropped with it
to the floor
gasping
and trembling
in pain and fear
like a fish out of water
with imminent death so clear

And then she bent down to look at me
With an apology in her eyes
Half my pain vanished when
embarassed, she said 'Hi'
I am so fucking sorry
that I hit you like that
I just saw your back
and I thought you were Matt
this is just a misunderstanding
so let me buy you a drink
then i'll check if you are ok
she said with a wink

You see where this is going?
I bet you think you do
But the kick in the balls didn't happen to you
(Not valid if you are a girl)
Cuz soon she got me drunk 
then she called Matt
I woke up in a car's trunk
Head bruised by a baseball bat

Now I'm left with no money
And I'm left with no honey
Just hurting balls and hurting head
And a poem that is mildly funny

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This is a prime example of how NOT to write a poem. The structure rolls around the body of the poem like hands of a drunkard on a woman. DO NOT attempt this at home, yours or someone else's, or in a cybercafe.

;)